Friday, April 29, 2011

Tuning the Heart

                                  Photo by James Landry

On Sunday I made a list of five items related to music, that I wanted to work with this week.  One of which was to attend the Collaboration Laboratory.  I promptly forgot three of the other four, and did nothing related to accomplishing the other one I remembered.  Then last night I pulled out the list and got to working on two of the other goals.  Good progress was made and after dinner tonight I was prepared to return to these.

A comment on a friends link on Facebook, brought up an old issue with me, one where my emotional entanglement is still alive.  Going back & forth a bit with this person, brought up times from my youth, which still have the power to disturb me.  Nothing wrong with looking at issues, but when my emotions are flaring and the mind engaging them, I find it difficult to do anything well.  I played for a bit, and then took a walk to let go of the energy and to reflect.  Back with the guitar I began working with the Etude in 7, and coupling this with ear training.  Focusing my listening in this way, brought me back to what I am doing right now.  Finding the space I was in with the Alexander Technique was also useful.

As I continued this, I began to allow the emotions I was feeling to inform the music in the Etude.  This is a tremolo piece, sad and reflective.  I began to dedicate this piece to the victims of gun violence.  Perhaps a title other than Etude will emerge.  Here in the land of the free and the home of the brave, there is so much violence.  I am so grateful that my musical pursuits have led to the transformation of much fear within me.  Fear that often was expressed as anger.  Time to return to the guitar.  To feel those vibrations against my chest and allow them to tune my heart.

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