. . . . . . . . . . ... I Am Not

 

A nap.

I really wanted a nap.

But it was late.

Too late to nap.

I must play my guitar, I must.

Because the nap would lead to me staying in  bed the rest of this day.

But first.

A Blessed AT lie down.

Played with a lie down in the prone position.

Using Missy Vineyards instructions.

This opened up something new.

Playing with AT directions.

Misdirecting my mind to allow freedom.

I am not playing the guitar.

And I did not.

I was not even holding a guitar.

Finding my center.

I am not holding my neck.

And I Am

Forward, up,     wide.

And then again. 

Lightly bringing

Different & various combinations,

of one hand or both and then again.

To the space where I am not playing guitar.

Finally

My guitar

Graces my body.

Quiet 

Body

Mind 

Strings.

 I allow my hands to float to the guitar.

As if driven by ocean currents.

I am not playing my guitar.

Moving hands.

Quieting mind.

Finding my center again,

and again.

Finally notes sing.

As I sing with them.

Boldly.

Uncharacteristically

BOLD.

The act of singing like this requires

Most of my attention.

And my hands play on.

I come to an end.

Pause.

Inhibit.

Think more negative directions.

I am not compressing myself.

And voila,

I was not.

More playing, 

More Alexander Technique.

More quiet.

More not playing while playing.

I am not a slave to my practice.

Another lie down.

First semi-supine.

Then prone.

More quiet.

Then this 

not playing Gathered Hearts 

A break w/out my nap.

Energized

Happy

Ready for more.

I am not holding my neck.

The setting sun

Silhoutes my shoulders, neck and head.

On the brick wall.

I am not doing the Alexander Technique.

But

It just may be

Doing me.

More playing.

More directing.

And now

A long big nap.