Here We Are Again

      Here we are again, the start of the end, but there's more ...
                                 Todd Rundgren


This is my 135th blog post of 2010.  What began as an experiment in the summer of 2009, has now become another regular practice.  Blogging has sharpened my observational skills, informed my practices, and allowed me to get to know interesting people.

Last night I began organizing various mp3 files I have of various works in progress.  These audio files, coupled with rough scores, allow me to go back to revisit and develop the various musical ideas and pieces that come to me.  While journaling this morning, I asked myself "How can I better organize myself to work with music?" One goal is to create the time to better tend to the scores and audio captures, so that I can address any idea or piece when I'm ready.  At times I have avoided working on a piece because I do not want to organize the mp3 files.

Musically this past year has been exciting.  My participation with the Orchestra of Crafty Guitarists in Sassoferrato, Italy was illuminating.  More consistent work with the Alexander Technique has nourished my guitar work and my practice of Qi Gong.  The two live recording sessions, with Tony Geballe, were a stretch that has resulted in some very good takes of both old and new works.  With the addition of a few more pieces, I will be able to release these live recordings.

Music, sweet music, continues to whisper.  I suppose I should count up the new works that have come into being this year, but not tonight.  I have undertaken a systematic approach to ear training to continue to court the muse and to increase the possibilities of my response.  Life is good, very good.  Thanks for reading and taking an interest in my work. Wishing you peace, love, health, and prosperity in the coming year.

When Will "It" Get Done?

What are the areas where I need to grow musically?  Ear training, improvisation, right hand fingerpicking technique, composition, rhythm and the list can grow into ever greater specifics.  Good to know where I am and where I want to go.  But when am I going to do these things?  So easy to make lists, but they do not get much done.  Unless I am  committed to them and work out the method and time to address what needs doing.

Then as the fruits of practicing come forth, I have this energy available to feed my commitment.  Slow steady progress unfolds once I am in motion.  Overcoming my inertia is the initial obstacle and then staying true to the path.

Now is the time, the only time I have to practice.  Coming into my relationship with the present moment remains the struggle.  Enough lists, books, ideas, and clever insights. Do it now!

Why I Play Music

I was finally able to sleep in a couple of extra hours today.  The Holiday demands of both my professional and personal life now being met.  Yesterday I woke with an invading microbe looking to live within my body.  So I did slip in some rest yesterday, while still tending to our Christmas celebration.

Today I needed to rest, and I have.  A gentle morning followed by an afternoon nap.  A cold, windy, and snowy Sunday keeping me inside to rest and stay warm.  Earlier, while resting, I was reflecting on why I play music?  On some level I know the answer, yet today I found it a good time to reflect on how I live my life.

So in my journal I asked the question - "What are my motivations for making music?"

          - The healing that my practice of music has given me.
          - The healing that my practice of music has given others.
          - My love of learning and the different opportunities my study
            of music has exposed to me.
          - The joy, peace, and sense of well being my practice brings to
             me.
          - The wonderful and amazing people, to whom this pursuit has
            introduced me.

After writing this I picked up my guitar for the first time since early Friday morning.  Gently allowing the opening notes of Gathered Hearts to resonate as I sang along.  Making no great demands on myself, I was just playing and listening.  As I allowed my body to release with the Alexander Technique directions, the tone of my guitar sweetened.  Moving onto Dancin' Free I watched the swirling snow through my window.  Pausing at times to hear certain intervals of this piece, I sang them, and then resumed my playing.  Forgetting my tiredness as I connected with Music; my body, heart, & mind united in the moment. Yes this is why I play.

What's a Model?

Well I was playing with Robert Henri's ideas about studying my beginnings, I chose the scale mentioned two days ago to serve as my "model."  Last night I composed another beginning with this scale.  While driving to work today I was visualizing part of what I wrote last night on the fretboard, as I could not hear this yet. Then I noticed that a couple of C#'s had slipped in though they are outside of the scale.  Not a problem really, just may need to create another beginning within the scale.

When I went to review the beginning from the first night I also found a couple of C#'s.  Laughing I thought well this is what happens when you practice and you're so tired.  Of course I am almost always tired when I practice so what to do?  I decided that I may look at this scale again or I may not.  Perhaps this is another manifestation of Eno's "mistake as a hidden intention."  The important point is that I chose a "model" and used this as a springboard for musical ideas.  Where this "model" takes me in either a learning or a musical context is what is important, not how strictly I adhere to my own initiating ideas.  I'll see how this develops over time, but for now I'm off to curl up with Begin Again: A Biography of John Cage by Kenneth Silverman.  A truly great read about a very influential man.

Studying Beginnings Day 2

In keeping with my stated desire to begin two pieces in the same scale but differently, and then alternate working on them, I have decided to not play through last nights work.  I had a rhythmic and harmonic idea about this as I drove to work this morning so I have a place to begin my investigation.  But first I need connect with myself, and then with my guitar.  Tonight I want to pay more attention to how I use myself in this process than I did last night.

The idea bore fruit, at least enough for a beginning that has attracted my attention.  Time for a little fun with my guitar and then to bed. I did complete the third of four major professional food events today.  My body is tired, but my spirits enlivened by seeing the end in sight. 

Studying Beginnings

BEGIN NOW

This is now.  Now is,

all there is.  Don't wait for Then;

                                        strike the spark, 
                                           light the fire.



I found the above words in a draft from many months ago, which made me think of  Robert Henri and his wonderful book, The Art Spirit.  In a letter to a class he stressed the value of studying beginnings of drawing.  This notion has intrigued me.  Tonight I was unclear how to begin my practice. Thinking of Henri I decided that perhaps I could make my own study of beginning a piece.  Then I thought I could begin three pieces.

I took my copy of Slonimsky's Thesaurus of Scales and Melodic Patterns and began flipping through the pages.  Just as I was prepared to put this down, I saw Scale 21 C D E F F# G# A# B C.  No idea what to do with this.  I ran through the scale a few times in one octave, and then found a chord based on C in fourths and was off and running.  I worked with this for 40 minutes and took a break.  During this time  I decided that this scale could be my "model" for the coming days, and I would create two beginnings. Then as Henri suggested to his students, I will alternate between the two 'pieces' and see how they develop.  Letting go of the idea of three pieces and focusing on working in a different way.

Something about this challenge is thrilling and also frightening.  Let the fun begin.  Now ...

Good Tone

As we ended our Qi Gong session this morning I thought the word for today was going to be Gratitude, and suddenly I heard myself say - Freedom.  As I formed these letters with my hands, this felt right.   Later in the day I found myself trapped in habit that wanted to be expressed in harsh dissonant tones.  Yet this type of tone was not appropriate to the music of this day.  But I wanted to play loud, aggressive, get someone's attention, perhaps maybe even teach them something.

And then Freedom floated into my thoughts.  What am I playing right now?  Is this the right tone?  Do I even need to be playing in this piece?  Then I found this gem -
 
    Good tone is active.  It is willfully produced, it is not something
    that just happens because of the harp you use or the amplification
    equipment you play through.  Tone is something the player
    puts in the note. Something the player does, actively, willfully,
    by exercising control over him/herself, his breathing, her playing,
    their music.

Getting through this session required constant tuning of the player, reminding myself that Good Tone is  Active.  Beginning again, and again, with Freedom as the aim to navigate this self composed difficult music.  What is the player doing now, is he active?  Or passive and unaware?  Exercising the skills developed through practice, while feeling the pull of how he wants to be heard.  Practicing Freedom, but oh what a struggle.  What can this player put in his notes?  Can I choose my tone?  Can I choose silence?