Possible Silence

... what I loved about Webb were the possibilities in his silence.  He was just there, like a small noon shadow 

 Michael Ondaatje
Coming Through Slaughter

What are the possibilities for me to be in silence?

To dwell in silence?

Silence must be cultivated.

Respected.

Cherished.

Possible Silences 

Possible lives.

Answers

Silence offers us the answers. -  From The Promise of a New Day

What do I offer Silence?  

Do I make myself available?  

Can I, will I listen if one arrives?

Photo by Sai Goey.

A Note Has Many Keys

A note has many keys.

One to the door of mystery.

One to the door of wonder.

Is there a door wherein lies silence?

Does the relationship between one note and others serve harmony in our thinking?

Does the relationship between one note and another allow disharmony to be understood?

To be freed?

A note has many keys.

Yet we possess so many more doors.

Where is the door which shelters silence?

Is it entwined in shadows?

Vibrate the shadows and release the song of one;

allowing Silence to roar through the past

and quiet the future.

A note has many keys and need be played in Now. 

Photo by Moyan Brenn

Wherein Lies the Distortion

There was a low level of anxiety in my body that I brought home from work today.  Is anxiety physical, emotional, or both I wondered?  A quick glance at the dictionary might clarify this, but for tonight the question was mine to examine and define.  For certain there was a definite low level distortion within myself.  I rested a bit and thought of having a night off from the guitar, yet I also knew I needed what the guitar can offer to me - music.

Entering my practice space, I immediately knew I needed to sit quietly first, and allow the anxiety to settle.  I could play through the anxiety, and have on other occasions, but then what am I practicing?  "Do nothing as much as possible" is the suggestion offered.  Sitting on my chair, following my breath, letting go of my day, I began to calm.  Yet there was this little tug in the area of my chest that wanted, maybe even needed the anxiety to thrive.  So I continued to sit, my body quiet, as well as my mind, with this sensation or feeling holding on, perhaps striving to take over.  Being gentle with myself, to myself, allowing all to settle.  Eventually this passed, as all formations do.  When I recognized that all was fairly quiet, I moved to my guitar.

Some nights the distortion lies more within my body, usually within the mind.  The more slippery situation is an emotional state that has me just off balance enough to linger and thwart.  All three are connected, and if I can begin my practice in a state of relative harmony, I am in a place where I can learn.  When one center is distorted, the guitar practice may still bring harmony.  If two of them are distorted,  I must do nothing as much as possible.  When all three are distorted, I am lost.

Practicing Silence

Soon I'll be increasingly quiet for a couple days. Some might say silent, but practicing silence is a better description. As the silence settles in about me, my body will relax, my thinking slow, my heart soften and maybe even open. The practice of silence has taken on more importance for me over the years. An opportunity to let go of my habitual manner of living and perhaps receive an insight to guide me. Sometimes I have let go of long held attitudes or emotions that were clouding my vision. Always the practice strengthens and nourishes me to continue practicing.

As the silence approaches, I listen. What am I doing or thinking in this moment that deafens the silence? Just as I listen when tuning a string, I can hear the "beats" as the two strings approach unison. Taking care to bring the two tones to a full bodied unison resonance. What are the "beats" in my mind as I approach silence? The breath tunes the mind while silence supports the tuning.

What does silence have to do with playing guitar? Everything ...

Sounds of Life

6:30 pm

Sitting quietly in my living room when suddenly the wind invites a crashing chord on the wind chime. The wind, the chimes, and myself return to silence.

Then the bass sound of a car door closing as the furnace crescendoes into a pulsing drone, the clatter of little feet playing an accelerando on the pavement. Key change as my grandaughter bursts through the door reciting text from a book on tape she had been listening to. Laughter, shrieks, and racket ensues in a post modern Ode to Joy.

8:30 pm
Happy to pick up my guitar as she lays down to rest. Life is very good. Began with ear training and work on Dandelion Wish. Break over. Time to play through and examine Why?

Photo by Ted Andes all rights reserved