Practicing Silence

Soon I'll be increasingly quiet for a couple days. Some might say silent, but practicing silence is a better description. As the silence settles in about me, my body will relax, my thinking slow, my heart soften and maybe even open. The practice of silence has taken on more importance for me over the years. An opportunity to let go of my habitual manner of living and perhaps receive an insight to guide me. Sometimes I have let go of long held attitudes or emotions that were clouding my vision. Always the practice strengthens and nourishes me to continue practicing.

As the silence approaches, I listen. What am I doing or thinking in this moment that deafens the silence? Just as I listen when tuning a string, I can hear the "beats" as the two strings approach unison. Taking care to bring the two tones to a full bodied unison resonance. What are the "beats" in my mind as I approach silence? The breath tunes the mind while silence supports the tuning.

What does silence have to do with playing guitar? Everything ...

Why Study Music?

   
  The practice of music allows me to better
          listen to the cries of another's soul.

Slipping in an Opportunity

I woke early today. Out of bed at 5am, dark with the insects humming outside. I did Qi Gong and sitting. A bowl of granola and decided to slip in some guitar practice before work. Both my body and mind were quiet as I slipped my guitar over my shoulder. Releasing and lengthening, I wanted to maintain awareness of my body in the seated position while playing. Keeping the Alexander Technique directions alive in my mind.

I decided to work on two passages, one from Lost Ballon and one from Dandelion Wish. I began with Lost Balloon and noticed almost immediately how refreshing practicing in this rested state was compared to at the end of my day. Playing with no sense of urgency, exploring my body in motion, and enjoying the process. I moved onto Dandelion Wish and again noted how nice it was to feel the whole day ahead of me. Expansive seems to describe the mode. I am happy to have seized this opportunity and to have disrupted my habit of getting ready for work and moving on.

And now to my regularly scheduled responsibilities.

9:50 am EDT

Interesting to note at 9am and again now 45 minutes later, how much the ease generated by this mornings AT work has stayed with me. Even after two pieces of information that have introduced upheaval and challenge into an already busy day. This sense of expansiveness in my day is being maintained. 

When Do I Begin to Listen?

Musicians listen deeply.  Any note can be invited to sound in a myriad of waves. Play a  note ponticello and you invite your listener to a different place then the same note played tasto; pianissimo offering a different state than forte. When my listening is attentive the quality of my playing changes. So when does a musician begin to listen during a practice session?

I asked myself this question as I approached my guitar this evening.  Then I heard the sound of the clasps that secure the case as I opened them. I listened as my strap slid over the strap buttons. I noticed the strap brushing against the fabric of my shirt as I brought my guitar to my body. I reveled in the beauty of the bringing my C string into tune. The bright attack as I secured the cable in the jack. The snap of the switch on the amp and the subsequent slight hum. I heard my body settle into my stool.


And then I noticed that already my mind had begun to quiet from the distraction of my day. I heard my nails touching the strings as I began playing Dancin' Free. A short but active run through of Dancin' Free, Kinnara, & Stepping Stones ensued. I wanted more but had to honor an obligation this evening. I was able to collect the joy generated from this brief session and take it with me. We got into the car, I heard the engine roar, and then I was lost.

When will I begin to listen again? Will it be with my beloved guitar or with a person? Suddenly I hear myself say "don't criticize" as a man begins to share his voice. That one thought the coda to my day. Here I was - Alive again. I was improvising my response to the theme that was actually stated, harmonizing in a new direction, rather than falling back on my habitual historical rendering of old melodies that did not fit this music. Yes musician listen deeply; listen to the sounds of life.  Allow your listening to be in service to the muse. Regardless of the instrumentation, the style, or the ensemble be present to the music that is being played. Be it the sound of  a string or of a string of thoughts, I know I will get lost again. So when do I begin to listen?

The Fate of Strings

Today the strings will be changed. Fieldwork DC begins this afternoon and I will be participating, that means playing, and to do that I must have new strings on my Godin. The Field process has been very useful for me over the years. In fact, one of the reasons I now play solo came as a result of a Fieldwork session. After FingerPaint faded, I continued to dabble in electronic music, primarily using long digital delays. This involved a lot of equipment and it was too much work to tear down, reset, play for a short time at the workshop, tear down, and reset at home each week. So I would present my work using a CD. I was prepared to take another session of the Field when I found myself wanting to perform something live, instead of popping a CD in a portable player. Eight days before the beginning of the session I picked up my Ovation and was horrified at the state of my playing. A tremolo piece, Aftermath, emerged; and I was born as a solo guitarist. Eventually I let go of the plectrum and returned to fingerstyle.

But about those strings, they still not changed. One of the pieces I will show at The Field today is Beneath Dark Images, which I have not played for anyone other than my wife. I decided to play through it a couple of times before changing the strings and allow the piece to simmer in my brain. I became aware of my body using the Alexander Technique directions. Then I decided to begin by working with inhibition on a particular transition in Livin' the Dream. While the problem in this particular transition appears to be in my left hand, I noticed via the use of inhibition that I was tightening my right elbow in anticipation. This introduction of unnecessary tension and shortening has a direct result on my left hand fingerings.

I worked with this for twenty minutes and then moved onto Beneath Dark Images. The quality in my hands that was already present from the previous work informed my playing through of this piece. I addressed two transitions that are problematic and decided to capture this process for the blog.

Yet those strings remain to be changed and change them I now will. Then there is the debris to pick up in the yard. How can I incorporate the yard work into my practice?

Transitioning to Performance Mode

A lot of my practice has centered around new material lately. But now the dates for Alive 2 or perhaps Alive Again are quickly approaching. I had a great phone conversation with Tony Geballe this morning regarding strategies and practicalities for this live recording session. Building on what was learned and assimilated in July we are now moving forward. Tony is such a great person to work with; I am truly blessed.

Checking the stats on this blog this afternoon I was pleasantly surprised that there were 50 hits in one hour this morning. I had not posted anything since Monday which made this activity even more unusual. I checked the posts that were looked at and decided to read them again myself. They were centered around my work with the Alexander Technique. Within these posts I found what I needed to guide my guitar work from this perspective for the afternoon. I also began an organization of my writings to further inform my future practices.

I had decided during last nights session to focus on particular transitions in Dancin' Free and Beneath Dark Images. Incorporating the AT principles to this practice allowed me to maintain a certain freedom of use and to notice when I was end gaining.  Again and again coming back to giving myself the directions. I also began to have a sense of "allowing my spine to release out of my pelvis," which William Conable spoke of in his workshop.

In all a good day's practice, now if only I could get around to changing my strings.  What transitions are you working on?

Finding Joy, Allowing Joy

A very busy weekend, filled with much joy being with my family, friends, & sangha. Then last night I attended a memorial service for an old friend. He lived a good life, was loved, and helped others in their lives. Today I attended a funeral service for a colleague's mother. Much sadder, bringing back memories of my own Mother and the loss I still feel 25 years after her passing. I returned to work, and the regular situations and challenges were just a bit tougher on me today. I was relieved as I made my journey home.

After dinner, we took a walk along Sligo Creek. We had the path to ourselves as this had been a dark, dreary, & rainy day. I needed to hear the Creek singing her song, the crickets singing theirs, and the leaves rustling in the wind. Slowly my mood elevated. Returning home I filed my right hand nails as they were getting to long to be useful as a guitarist.

Being not quite ready to practice I decided to see if there was an older post from this blog that would guide my practice. I rarely do this, but tonight thought there might be something there. I found this post on Disrupting Habit from March. And then I knew how to begin my practice. I picked up on working with bringing my hands to the guitar after giving the AT directions to lengthen. I played with this a bit and then brought both of my hands to the guitar simultaneously.  This was once my habit that David Jernigan had disrupted in the spring. This action now had a different quality to it or perhaps this was another case of my faulty perception. I began playing with arpeggios at random and then suddenly began playing the first piece of music I ever had come through me. This was full of joy and exactly what I needed to continue shifting my emotional state.

Some more AT work with my hands and then onto playing Gathered Hearts . I just enjoyed the act of playing. The world became lighter. I moved on to improvising in C Hijaz and then took a break to write this post. Finding the joy of playing and allowing this joy to spread is important. The world may be dark. But no matter how dense the clouds on your darkest night, the moon, the stars, the entire cosmos - both inner and outer are available to us. My question remains - am I available?