Releasing the Heavenly Pillar

In the Daoist 12 Posture Qi Gong there is an exercise called Releasing the Heavenly Pillar which is how the Daoist refer to the spine.  This simple exercise was developed in a sitting meditation posture but can also be performed sitting in a chair or standing. This simple exercise to assists the spine in releasing out of the pelvis.  As I was practicing guitar this morning, I paused at one point and did this exercise three times in each direction while wearing my guitar.  Not the ideal situation, but I do what I do.

Later I paused to inhibit my activity and direct my thinking with my current twist on the Alexander Technique Directions I mentioned in yesterdays post.  Playing through a section I was working on, the thought to release the Heavenly Pillar arrived.  As I noticed this thought I also noticed a release in my right arm and hand which was welcomed.

Photo by Sue Clark

The Grip

Working with David Jernigan in an Alexander Technique session years ago, he first mentioned The Grip which is a characteristic of my right hand.  I have noticed The Grip manifest in other activities, but on the guitar this not only impedes my ability to execute but also stresses and strains muscular activity through my elbow and most likely further.  This morning I was practicing a section on the high register of the guitar, where my left hand fingers have to move about and land in a confined space.  As I breathed out and began to play this part I noticed The Grip had manifested.


 Why?  How could tightening the hold on my right hand possibly improve the use of my left hand?  In actuality this tightening adversely impacts my left hand by inducing stress in the system.  As I mentioned I've noticed The Grip in other activities such as walking, holding a cup, holding a clip board so perhaps The Grip goes deeper than the guitar.  My right hand is my dominant hand. Is this a manifestation of power or control issues?  Fear, the usual culprit is most likely adding to the fray.  Obviously I do not know what this all means and may not need to. 

Looking down and to the right to "guide" this activity with my eyes may also not be helping in this instance.  The little bit of tension arising in my neck is then transferred throughout the system.  Let the left hand do the work it is doing and the right hand do it's work and no more.  How to untangle this? Fortunately, I can come back and still my breath, offer myself the Alexander Technique Directions and let go a little bit. 

Returning to the guitar to work further on this section, I quickly decided a lie down was in order.  Tune my system and then see if I can introduce ease into my playing.  While this was better, I still needed help so I turned to my current take on AT directions that were revised at the beach this week.  May my head float up to the Heavens as my body is as wide as the Ocean and my feet dance on the Earth.  Holding these spatial directions for a few breaths I then brought my smiling hands to the guitar. 

The Grip is not gone, but has eased a bit.  Old habits have energy and require intention, awareness, and energy to release.  I am grateful for the path.

Photo by Andrea Rose

Release What You Don't Need

Release, constant release requires conscious participation.  Requires nourishing my awareness and practicing coming back to the present moment over and over.  Support of other practicioners moves me to spaces I am not capable of achieving on my own.

Release the unnecessary.  How much of my way of moving is unneeded and unrelated to how the system is designed?  Tension, misguided effort, and plain old habit cloud my capabilities.  What am I releasing - the past, the future, the unseen?  Can I allow my body and mind to arrive right where I am?

As I focus on the Alexander Technique direction of width I notice my tendency to hold my right shoulder rolled forward with my arm slightly pressing against my body.  This puts pressure on my breathing, though this pressure is generally below the level of my awareness.  This habit also pulls on my back, tiring & misusing muscles which then pull on other muscles, introducing tension throughout my system.  And I seldom notice this.  Why?

Habits of hurry and inattention.  Years of neglect of how I use myself resulting in well worn pathways in my brain mandating this is how life is.  Mimicking of how others use themselves, for instance in playing the guitar, without my own playing being based on principles.

Yet the simple thought of "wide" without actually doing anything, allows a release of muscles doing unnecessary work.  Allows a release of tension from the strains my habitual unnecessary work produces.  And this simple thought quiets the mind, bringing me into the present.  A new if transitory pattern is introduced, one based on principles of releasing into the design of the musculoskeletal system.  Even though this release is transitory the basis for a new way of moving is being established.

Introducing the thought of the AT directions, over and over, as I remember, allows the release into a new way of being.  Connected with my thinking, my body and the space around me a gentle release like the melody of clouds I saw at sunrise today arises.  Moving with grace and ease, according to the way the design allows.  Release.  What am I releasing?  Habits, judgements, opinions and neglect. 

Release what you don't need was a comment from Pedro de Alcantara's interview with Diana Rumrill.  What is it that I need?  What do I not need?  How do I determine my needs?  The Alexander Technique provides me the framework to see, experiment with, and find what I am doing and more importantly what I need to be doing or not.  The directions allow me to release what I do not need and to lengthen & widen in movement and in life.  What are you releasing?

Releasing, Always Releasing; When I Remember

Release.  Release. And then release some more.  Entrenched habits release slowly over time. The past week has been fruitful in my Alexander work related to my tennis elbow. As time permits I will firm up my notes on the work I have been doing with this.

Tonight I returned to reviewing the various posts in this blog referencing my application of the Alexander Technique.  More than one person has told me that there may be a book in here.  Time to find out if this is true.  After 40 minutes or so at my desk, I stood and knew that I must do a lie down.  Smiling at the appropriateness of this noticing, I hit the floor and let my back and spine release.  No matter how many times I partake of the lie down (also known as constructive rest), I still marvel at the affect this has on my body and mind when I am done.

While practicing the guitar tonight I paid particular attention to directing my neck to be free and my arms longs.  After my initial improvisations I played through a piece much louder than I normally would to hear what this might sound like and to also develop that as a latent ability.  Then  I played this same piece through again at normal volume paying attention to the emotional quality of the piece.

I moved on to a technically challenging piece that is currently challenging my stamina to get through the piece.  As I was playing through this I noticed myself tensing as the last section arrived.  Part of me wanted to keep going and sacrifice my use to end gaining once again.  Instead  I paused for 8 beats.  With my hands still on the guitar I just took a moment for constructive thinking.  When I had released the unnecessary tension I resumed playing through to the end.  Instead of "toughing it out," making mistakes and possibly aggravating my elbow, I took care of myself.

After this I took a break to practice Qi Gong for 10 minutes.  With the energy flowing, I returned to the guitar and this particular piece again.  At the same tempo my playing was even throughout the piece and I was able to release energy into the notes, not just hold on until the end. I noticed as I frequently do in my morning practice, how the Qi Gong allows my spine to release out of my pelvis. That as my energy flows, I become centered and connected.  But this release takes effort on my part - to do the Qi Gong exercises or to direct my thinking in AT.  Always back to releasing.  And now I release this post into the world.

What do you need to release.

Release

Release your neck.

Release your limitations and expectations.

Release love into the world.

Release that which you hold so close - secrets, lies, and tales.

Release to openness.

Release love into the world.

Release the possible.                               And wonder ...

Releasing the Hold on My Holding Hand

Yesterday and again today at various times I paused and checked in and directed my body with the AT directions.  I continue to notice the left hand assuming some type of position relative to the right.  The left elbow appears to be "held" to a degree resulting in tension, whereas in the right elbow this is not noticed.  Working with my guitar tonight I was reviewing how I bring my left hand to the guitar.

Using inhibition of the act, I did notice a slight tensing in my left shoulder as I thought of moving the hand to the guitar.  This is in the area beneath my strap, an area I had issues with years ago resulting from lifting the shoulder to meet the weight of the guitar.  My dear friend and dance legend Robert Ellis Dunn, noticed me doing this and helped me to correct this situation.  So I removed the guitar and began bringing my left hand to the guitar, looking to see if I can maintain my length and freedom while not having the weight of the guitar on my body.

Still I noticed a certain holding in the hand, but then again how long have I been doing this?  How long has this been "working" for me?  Then I began performing the same motion with my right hand and arm, as if I was going to fret the notes with my right hand.  As this arm does not usually move in this way, the habit of how my right hand would arrive at the fretboard is not ingrained in me.  After a few times with this motion on the right, I began to alternate between the right and left arms.  Slowly the movement on the left seemed to let go a bit, as if bilateral transfer was taking place.  Slight degrees of freedom being attained.

When I returned to the guitar, I mimicked bringing my right hand up to the neck.  Mind you, my right arm is not encumbered by the weight of the guitar, but I just wanted to play with the concept of bilateral transfer some more.  After a few times of alternating the right and the left I played a few notes.  The quality of these notes were noticeably better than my earlier playing.  Resisting my desire to end gain and keep playing, I continued to experiment with bringing my arms to the guitar neck, real and imagined.  Then I allowed my left arm to extend out away from my body along the line of the shoulder and then drawing my arm back to the body while releasing the elbow and turning the arm to bring the hand to the neck.  I'm certain I have never used my left arm in this manner before.

After doing this a few times, I began to play, the notes were beautiful, but then something happened, where I flinched my neck and/or left shoulder.  This was not a conscious choice, nor a habit, but did introduce tension.  Beginning again, I extended the arm and brought my hand to the guitar in this unorthodox manner.  I began to improvise and enjoyed a freedom of use which fed the improvisation.  From here I played portions of pieces and enjoyed the joy of music making.

Releasing Hand, Holding Hand

An interesting Alexander Technique session with David Jernigan tonight. As he worked with me, he came out with the notion of my releasing hand and holding hand. I did not understand this at first, until he explained that my right hand releases the string,  and was thus my releasing hand.  What David had noticed was that my left hand, the one that "holds" the note, had a tendency, perhaps even a habit, of assuming a position.  This is in contrast to my right hand which tends to just be a hand.  But this holding of the left hand in a "position" even when the hand is not doing anything was what he was working to release.

As we worked with this release, I could sense the freedom that came from this letting go of the position.  From years of focused work with my right hand, I find it easier to come into a relationship with this hand.  As we worked tonight, I saw that I was developing a new relationship with my left hand.  A basic Guitar Craft principle is for the left hand to release the finger(s) from the string, rather then take them from the string. I have worked with this concept extensively, yet there appears to be a greater release that is available to me.

The Value of Playing

I am increasingly finding that the moments that I spend with my guitar are very precious. Listening with my heart and soul, just playing; right here, right now.  These Moments change me and the world.  What more could I ask of myself, of my guitar?  Right practice serves to lengthen these moments, to better prepare me to respond to any moment; to be in this moment. 

As Homer so eloquently asked the muse - "Sustain for me this song, make this tale live for us in all it's many bearings."  Echoing this prayer, may I play my notes unfettered by concern, and be free to listen, to follow and to learn. Then these moments of freedom expand and they serve.  May I embrace this moment, resting in the understanding that there is no other.  May I Listen, play and just be.

Giving myself permission to improvise, I venture into the unknown.  I may uncover myself for fleeting moments; or yet again see myself in habitual manners of use; or I may touch my feelings in a new way.  What happens in these moments? A harmony within, reaching out to hold and reveal.  As the moments pass, do I devolve into end-gaining, holding onto what was?  Or can I sustain my freedom to explore, lengthening in each moment to what is?  Maintaining the freedom of how I use myself now appears key.   Say yes to this musical moment and connect with all that I am.

May I connect with this moment, bringing my desires to rest.  In doing so, I release who I was and open to the possible. Slowly my muscles lengthen and widen to the freedom and lightness of being.  All begins with the breath, with awareness of the breath.  Connect, breath out and release the note into this present moment, into all moments.  Connect, inspire and release who I am meant to be.

A Near Mistake

                                    photo by Tj Matthews


Some days are tough.  Circumstances, reactions, habits, and tiredness collide and I get lost.  Kept coming back to my breath, to giving myself the AT directions, and then another straw would be added to my load.  Lost, return, lost, lost, slight return.  A downward spiral ...

I came home exhausted. After resting and dinner, I watched Without a Trace, and then watched another one.  Perhaps it was time for a night off from the guitar, to make no more demands.  Then another reaction,  and I retreated to my practice space.  Working with an idea David gave me in AT class, I began to play Gathered Hearts.  A slight shift in my energy, and I moved onto Livin' the Dream.  Releasing the pent up feelings and realizing that tonight I needed to play music.  Feeling the notes, listening to the feelings,  and connecting with what is good in me.  More playing led to more release, and with release I touched what is good.  After improvising for a while, I moved to exploring A Lydian.  A subtle connection with a larger community, a vital community.

There is a time and place for a night off from practicing.  But tonight I needed my practice, needed music to help restore me.  Grateful that this mistake was averted, hope rekindled, and now to rest.

Moments of Release

Our word for the day during Qi Gong practice today was - Release.  Many times during this day, "release" returned to guide and assist me.  Often through my application of the Alexander Technique and my awareness cultivated by finding my breath.  Below are a few moments when "release" entered the day.

Release my neck.

Release the notes.

Release my left hand fingers from the fretboard.

Release others to be free.

Release judgement.

Release the brake.

Watching the ice release from car roofs in front of me. 

Release  my expectations.

Release my spine.

Release kindness.

Release desire.

Release my breath.

Release judgement.

Release judgement. (I wonder how many of these I have missed.)

Release my neck and pelvis.

Release my history with another. (perhaps a variation on release judgement.)

Releasing nasty and vindictive thoughts.

Releasing demands on myself.

Release love.

Release my guitar from the case.

Release my heart into music.

Release this blog post.

I noticed today that release invites freedom into my life, into life.  What can you release?

Release II

Release continued to be a theme for today. I was in a colleagues office and saw a book titled The Release of Information ... and I smiled. Took me back to my practice of last night with just those few words of a text related to the legal aspects of our profession. I put in a long day at work today. This was needed, productive, and also very tiring. More and more I feel the toll my professional work takes on me.

After a short nap and dinner I was talking with my wife. She asked me if I felt like practicing. Of course not was my reply, but I will. Tonight there was no resistance to doing an Alexander Technique lie down to begin. Allowing the muscles to slowly unwind and let go of the week was nourishing. I thought of a line from Kenny Werner's book Effortless Mastery: Liberating the Master Musician Within that we release our concern for sounding good. I thought yes this is some old information I can release for tonight. Just have a little fun with my guitar.

I  moved to the guitar and played through a few pieces. I was enjoying my playing, allowing myself to be gentle and let the music take me. I then decided to play through Beneath Dark Images, a piece which began over a year ago that I found an ending for last weekend. Again just a gentle play through, reminding my body and mind of the piece. From here I moved to a piece form the Frames period that also needs an ending. At one point I found myself grabbing  a couple chords reminiscent of Jimi's Castle's Made of Sand opening, sans the effects. This appeared to fit so I played around with the chords for a while. Then the next discovery which led me to a potential ending for this piece.

I taped this three times to capture the ideas that surfaced tonight. I'll listen back another to hear the results. Smiling I completed my session. I told myself I was too tired to write this, but here I am.

I find myself wondering what more is there to release?


Photo by Mikael Hivdtfeldt Christensen

Release

                                                

Having a relatively good practice session tonight. The last few days I have been hampered by effects of a recent medical procedure complicated by tiredness. But tonight I was ready, willing, and able. I began with a 20 minute Alexander Technique lie down. So delicious after a days work to release the muscles of my neck, back, arms, & legs. This also serves to quiet my mind But of course there was resistance to beginning my practice session with the lie down.


Why is this? I know from experience that when I begin with one I am engaged with my body and thus my playing on a different level. But my habit is to rush and to dive in. So I remind myself of my intent to engage with my guitar in a qualitative manner. By the end of the lie down I was asking myself why do I ever resist doing what I know works?

As I moved to the guitar I explored an exercise for my right hand and then addressed some issues in three pieces. Two of these pieces share a similar issue with harmonics. While working with the first harmonic related issue I found myself thinking "release" as my hands moved to invite the harmonic to sound. Success. I continued with this and sensed a freedom in my neck & shoulders. Moving onto the other related issue I again thought of "release" as I moved to play the harmonic. Success and ease spread through this section.

As I moved onto playing through a different piece I found myself thinking about what had just transpired. Wondering if I should write this up for the blog. When I noticed that my playing was being adversely affected I told myself to be quiet and pay attention to what I was doing. Yet the internal dialogue persisted. Why is this happening and why now? I knew I needed to stop playing and re-center myself.

I can not change this problem of internal chatter while playing from within the problem. I must pause, find my breath and body and allow the chatter to dim. I know this from experience, yet over and over again I attempt to "muscle through" in a sense and continue to play and continue to chatter. The acot of pausing is another form of releasing. This particular release took me to my computer to begin capturing and examining this experience. Now I may resume my guitar work.

What are you releasing?

Photo by Ian San.